Life as is

I am already struggling with words to form and put on this thing, SAD! Oh well, its overdue. The biggest and best thing I have to put right now is that I WENT TO FENWAYYYYY! And they lost and my least favorite Red Sox player probably of all time was pitching and its totally his fault that we lost. GRR! BUT! Fenway was fantastic. I had tears in my eyes when I walked in. I KNOW its so so so SOOOOO incredibly stupid! But I just can't help it! It was the coolest thing ever. So close to these players, some who I have watched for years and years! It was very surreal. Everything about it was great. And one of my best friends from college was with me, Scottie. He has been going to Fenway since he was a kid and it was the best seats hes had he said! So it ment a lot to me that it was a good present for my dear buddy Scottford! I can't even put it into words right now, maybe I can later. It seems like I'm in the homestretch for so many things that what I really like has taken a backseat. Not that I am not having a blast, I SO am! But its been kindda sucky, experiencing all this with people that I've just met. They are all for the most part fantastic and tons of fun but stinks the people I would love to share this with just can't be here with me. It also got me thinking about how much I love people and love meeting them but how hard it is for me be open with them. I hate meeting new people in the sense that I don't like the initial, shallow questions. I can't explain who I am and what I'm about, you have to see it. Mostly because is sounds like a load of bullshit. I feel awful when it comes to explaining me in words. Its incredibly frustrating. And I like seeing who people are through their actions. Anywho. I am so so SO sleepy but I really wanted to get on her and I guess attempt to describe Fenway while it was fresh in my mind. I have so much more to say, as usual but somethings just can't be explained. In due time =)